Facing Fear
The chalkboard art in my room is currently inspired by a quote I heard from an interview with Brene Brown,
(h/t Donna Hall for introducing me to Brene Brown, showing me the Podcast app on my phone and changing my life forever in the midst of a late night painting frenzy!)
Here’s the quote:
It’s possible to be afraid and brave in the very same moment.
She goes on to say that she finds herself in a state of being both afraid and brave all the time, and it is the willingness to be brave while we are afraid that is the essence of our power.
Being Brave and Afraid
A few summers ago I wrote a post about how my kids weren’t little anymore about how it was breaking my heart to endure so many changes.
Now I look at the girl who wrote those words four years ago, and I wish I could tell her to quit whining. I want to say to her,
You only think you know about change. I’ll show you change.
How about you empty your entire house of every piece of everything you’ve ever owned, quit your whole life here in Arkansas and fly to a new country with your husband and four kids with only what you can fit into a handful of suitcases?
How about you start all over in a new place where you are jobless, homeless and friendless?
How’s that for change?
The most common question I am asked right now about our upcoming move to Scotland goes something like this,
How are you feeling about everything?
Some days, I am about to bust with excitement. Challenge! Travel! Adventure! People with cool accents!
Other days, I am paralyzed by fear. How are we going to live? What will we eat? Are we destroying our lives? Will our kids hate us forever? Where will I buy black beans and steel cut oats in bulk?
Most days, I can only put one foot in front of the other. Today I will paint one room in our house. Tomorrow I will call about having the carpets cleaned. I will clean out one more shelf. One more cabinet. I will box up just this one section of our life and close the door on it for a season.
One thing I can say for certain is that I am afraid. I have almost no answers to my questions. I have even fewer answers for my family’s questions.
So I love the idea of being brave in the midst of all the fear. I think I’ve been calling it foolishness. Or blind faith.
But now I am going to say in my heart that we are brave.
I am brave.
And afraid.
At the same time.
How about you? Is there a place where you are afraid and brave at the same time? Do you find that the two often coexist?
I am a sailor and surfer. Need I say more? :)))
Yes. I would think both of those require a LOT of bravery! 🙂
Selfishly… I don’t want you to go. Maybe though, just maybe, it is the impetuous I need to save and go visit Scotland. Grumpy, arms crossed, pouting friend over here.
Definitely!! Save up for a ticket and come stay with me for free!
I had no idea you were moving to Scotland! It’s so random that I saw this post and read it. That is so cool (and scary, I know), but really so cool. I was just talking about how much I miss living in another country and trying to really know another culture. I was just talking about how I want so badly to pack up my whole family and move overseas. I believe I also recognized that doing so would be so scary, and that I’d likely cry a lot (so Matt would have that added burden of taking care of me, as well as dealing with his fear of moving abroad with kids). But I still want to do it. And so many people do it successfully–and even though it is hard, it will be sooo good for your kids. But I really need to know more–why are you moving? how long will you be there? Where will you be living? Yay!
It is a long time dream for us too!!
Taido will be getting his PhD at Aberdeen. He spoke about it church a few weeks ago. You can hear him via Fellowship’s podcast and he had also written a lot about it on his blog at taidochino.com.
Fun to hear from you, Kelly!!
Facing down my fears at the Chino House {blog} http://wp.me/p2DMSG-38f
You are one of the bravest women I know. Enjoy this time, embrace your inner gypsy. I will miss you though!
That might be the best compliment anyone has ever paid me!! Thanks so much!!
Of course you can be afraid and brave at the same time. Jesus was afraid, so afraid he sweat blood. So that proves there’s nothing sinful or wrong about having fear. It’s just what you do with it and where you place it.
I’m regretting right now that I never reached out more to get to know you better, especially since I am so awkward in groups (either really shy or defensively effusive). Hopefully our paths will cross a few more times before your big adventure! You will be a blessing to so many, as you already have been.
So true, Christie! Thanks! and YES, I’m still around for a little while yet. 🙂
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